Even though most of today was good, I'm still in a really cranky and fowl mood.  I hate feeling like this!  I hate being like this.  I am absolutely miserable right now.  I would snap in a second, I was flipping out driving home from work and I have a pounding headache.  I am laying on the sofa and I have absolutely no desire to move right now.

BUT, in a few minutes I need to get my butt up and ready so I can go head to kickboxing.  I know that is the one thing that will snap me out of this.  I will toss on my gloves and punch and kick the HELL out of that bag with everything I have in me.  I will leave it all there on the mats.  Then hopefully I'll head home exhausted and I'll just pass out after a quick shower. 

I doubt I'll go right to sleep, but I'm at least hoping for it! 

I'm not sure what exactly got me into this mood in the first place.  But once it started, it spiraled and kept going and going! 

None of my friends are going to kickboxing, which is another thing making it hard to get up off the sofa to go there.  So much easier when someone is expecting me to be there.  But I know this is something I need to do for me tonight.

I need to go.  I need to punch and kick.  I need to get this all out.  I have way too much on my mind today.  It was slow at work and I had too much time to think.  With me, that is NEVER a good thing.  I can get way too far inside my head and basically create problems where there are no issues at all!  I know it, but once it starts, I can't snap out of it! 

So I sent a SUPER long email to a friend of mine, venting on EVERYTHING on my mind.  Things I knew I was doing wrong and things that were bothering me too.  Situations I'm in that I don't know how to handle.  She's a great listening and gives very supportive advice.  She very sweetly points out things she doesn't agree with and makes great suggestions.  I love her and trust her.  And she's always SO kind in her answers. 

But now... I'm home.  Alone.  Trying to stay out of my head and trying to NOT make choices I know are not the best. 

So... in a few minutes I will hopefully get up to change, then leave for kickboxing.  Hopefully.