I am so relaxed right now. This feels good. Last week was a pretty tough week at work. The weekend has been nice. Friday night I did absolutely nothing... just relaxed, watched tv, surfed my computer and read a magazine.
Yesterday was a BLAST! I went kayaking on the Charles River. We had so much fun! I'm feeling ok today too... we were out for 3 hours. I wasn't sure how I'd feel today. So far so good.
Once I get my butt out of bed, I'll be heading up to my parents today. Originally I was going to go with my mom to the driving range but she seems to think we should to to a par 3 golf course instead. I'm super nervous about it, but the worst I can do it really bad. I'm expecting that. I have never playing on a course and I have only had 4 lessons. I'm not going be good! :) So I am just going to have fun with it and see where it goes. I can practice with the new clubs I have and get ready to play the par 3 course with my friends on Tuesday night.
Tonight I have roller skating too. Going to be a long day. Mom expects me at her house in just over an hour and a half... I'm in bed unshowered! I need to get moving soon! Some days you just want to chill!
Happy Sunday!

Another rough day at work today. But golf lessons were so much fun and dinner and a glass of wine after were fun and helped relax me. I feel SO much better now. I really like this group and I love being with these people.
I keep trying to find the positive but some days are easier then others. I hope that I can make it through the rest of the week ok.
Tomorrow, weather permitting, I'll be running, then Thursday night is back to bootcamp if it isn't raining. Saturday is kayaking and Sunday night I have roller skating. It'll be a fun and busy weekend! :)

What a day! SO happy there is 1 hour and 35 minutes left of this monday. VERY crazy day all day long!

bootcamp

I haven't done a bootcamp in maybe 2 months. Yup, lost it! I KNOW I am going to be hurting tomorrow. Alex kicked my butt. I am going to have to keep on this and go every single Thursday night from now on. I wish I had money to do one on one with her. Its just over $1000 for 26 sessions... so twice a week for 3 months. I'd be in SUCH great shape. I can hope and pray that I can come into money at some point! :) Either way, I will need to keep doing her classes. Ideally I will do Thursday nights and Saturday mornings. Then I can running 3 times a week too.
Of course the chips I'm eating right now wouldn't be the best choice! :)

Goals

I can't believe how well I am doing. I am SO proud of me. I did another 3 miles tonight at the track. It was tough but more of a mental thing. I did my pace, had my IPod on and I was good. Around 2 miles got tough, but I felt good finishing it up and even put in an extra boost on the last lap! VERY proud of how far I have come.

After I got home tonight, I drove around my block. I had a feeling it was a mile. Yup... EXACTLY! Funny! I was a little worried about running the 3rd time this week, but I think I will just run my block now. I'll know that it is 3 miles and I won't have to worrry about where I am at on the laps. The weather is going to be 90 on Saturday so obviously I'll be beach bound, but I can run that block before I go. I'll just get up early. That'll be SO hard just running on the road, different than the track, but again... mental challenge. And now I know I can do it!

Tomorrow night is boot camp again. Alex is going to kick my butt but I can't wait for it! I need it. I have slacked over the past few months working out. Yeah, I've been doing the 5K training, but that's it. SO I really need to get back in gear with everything else.

Things are good. I just need to keep focusing on the positive. I know I am great with setting goals and working to achieve them. I am extremely determined when it comes to meeting expectations I set for me and those that are set for me. I need to continue to find positive goals to work for that will keep me on the path I want to go on.

Also, in areas that are challenging... like work and some difficult accounts I handle, I need to change my mindset. Today after some great insight I received, I realized many things. Yes, I am great at goals. I did a great job about keeping my New Year resolutions the past few years... reaching my goals, and I have continued to push myself out of my comfort zone, through the fear and pushed past to further my horizons. I do that in my personal life amazingly well. Now I need to change my mindset at work. I need to take what has been working so well in my personal life and apply it to the office. I need to rewire the way I think about work and the issues that come up that cause me stress and make me crazy.

I feel really good about all of this. Things are going well and going in the right direction. And the insight from today will really make a great impact in my life.

I am SO proud of me today! I ran 3 miles straight, without stopping AT ALL! I didn't think I could do it. I am so happy with this running group. I think I would have quit on myself it wasn't for them. They really helped support me through this and made me believe in myself to do it! I ran 3 miles! I never thought I could say that! WOW! Yay me! :)
I can't wait until Wednesday night to do it again! I am hitting my monthly goal SO much earlier! SO, if I can do this, if I can run the 3 miles again Wednesday, then on either Friday or Saturday, I will have already made one goal for the month of June! and not only made the goal, but BEAT it! My goal was to run 2 miles, 3 times a week. I did 3 miles! Again, YAY ME! :)
As far as the other goals... I haven't been on a scale since May at my mom's and I won't until July 3rd when I am back at her house. Maybe there will be a change, maybe not, but already... I RAN 3 MILES! :)
I haven't knowingly given up control over a situation, but nothing has really come up that I wanted control over. Not sure if I'm just letting go more in general or not, or what, but it really hasn't been an issue.
As far as one positive way I dealt with stress... I think just looking forward to running last week is one. I really do. I like the time on the track. I enjoy it. I am in the moment. I'm not really thinking about anything except for being on the track and running and finding my pace. I started in the 4th lane and worked my way down to one. Then I repeted lane 1 and worked back to 4 and repeted 4 and went back down to lane one to finish. I know I wouldn't remember to count what lap I was on, so switching lanes really helps! :)
June is really turning out to be a good month. I'm happy. Things are going ok. Work is ok. My social life is ok. My health is ok. My finances are ok. It is all ok right now. Maybe that's why I haven't really had to deal with stress or with letting go of control. Everything is ok right now.
SO I think I'll just sit and be happy and be good with ok! :)

5K training

SO tonight was a GREAT night at training. I had a breakthrough! I FINALLY found my pace! I hope I can find it again! :)
I started running with a mile straight, then I needed to walk. I just couldn't do it. I walked a lap. Then I started running again. And on my 3rd lap, I was so shocked, I said it out loud... I found my pace!
On that second time running, I ended up doing a mile and a half! I was SO proud of me. Combined I did 2 1/2 miles. That was a really big deal!
I'm hoping that on Wednesday I can find my pace and run 2 1/2 miles straight. That'll be GREAT!!

And today at work... I was VERY stressed. I was so angry at people, frustrated and just overall defeated. But instead of losing it... I thought about running. I knew I was going to be at the track at 6:30 and I couldn't wait. I know when I am at the track I am completely present in the moment. I couldn't wait. So I am working on my goals and getting there.

5K time

Just checked the website for my official time, 37:51. Not to bad. I realized that last time I ran in October, I started 2 weeks early and added in 3 weeks to the 9 week program. So I really trained for 14 weeks and I got 36:22. this time, I am 1 1/2 minutes slower with only 6 weeks of training! That's REALLY good and I'm super proud of myself for that. I know I'm in better shape this time around. I know I will be able to run 2 miles, 3 times a week NO PROBLEM by the end of this month. If I did a 10:20 mile, I'll be fine! SO my goal for tomorrow night at the track is to run a mile and a half solid without stopping. And I'd like to go for 2 miles straigh, but I'll take 1 1/2. And I want to run a total of 2 1/2 miles, which is what week 7 is supposed to be, but all together with no walking. I'll be SO excited if I can get to 2 miles solid! I'm proud of myself for how far I have come. This is a big deal. Little progress at a time, but it is all moving in the right direction. :)

Ran in a 5K today. Pretty proud of how I did, especially considering I just finished week 6 of a 9 week running program... not up to 3 miles yet! My time after running mile one was pretty good. 10 minutes 20 seconds. I was happy with that. I started walking shortly after that and did a combination of walking and jogging from then on. I finished unofficially at 37:40 (I need to check the website to see for sure). My first 5K last year after 12 weeks of training, I finished in 36:22, so that's not too bad. If I keep it up, I'll be running 3 miles no problem! I feel good for finishing.
Originally I was hoping the rain would hold out, but after the 2nd water station somewhere in mile 2, I was praying for rain. It is so hot and humid out! Rain would have felt good! But I did it and I'm really proud of it. I was scared to do it, but I did it anyway!
And tomorrow night, I'll be back at the track training some more... we are scheduled to run 2 1/2 miles straight. I haven't even done 2 miles straight, so it'll be tough, but I am going to do the best I can.

I'm trying really hard to stay on course with my 4 goals for June. Some are easier than others. I haven't seen anyway that I have positively dealt with stress so far, but I have only had 2 days at work where most of my stress is created. Maybe on Sunday when I see my mother, but we'll see.
I was at the track tonight and did the furthest I have gone this round... 1 1/4 miles straight. I walked a lap, then ran another 1 1/2 laps. I was less than my original intention of completing 2 miles, but I still a mile and a quarter straight, so I'm celebrating that! And if I could run 1 1/4 miles on June 4th, then by the end of this month, 2 miles three times a week should be no problem! 3 miles could be a reality! We'll see. I'm going to try to add 1 more lap every time I run. Today was 5, Monday I'll try for 6, and Wednesday for 7. I'll see what I can do! :)
Weighing myself... that's been tough! I'm glad I don't have my scale at my house. I've left it at work. But it is still hard. Hopefully there will be results when I hop on a scale on July 3rd. :)
I haven't given up control at all at anything so far... I haven't noticed much that has come up. We'll see.

I feel good right now. I hope I can stay like this and have a productive weekend!